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Teaching Writing Craft: Show Don't Tell for Year 4-8

How to teach the principle 'show, don't tell' through explicit instruction, mentor texts, and revision.

ASR
Australian School Resources
19 March 2025 · Year 4-8 · English

Tell: "Sarah was angry."

Show: "Sarah's jaw clenched. She crumpled the letter and threw it across the room."

Telling summarizes emotion. Showing allows readers to infer emotion from action, dialogue, or description. Showing is more engaging.

When teaching 'show, don't tell,' start with emotions. Create a chart together:

Happy: Smiling, laughing, jumping, hugging

Sad: Crying, slouching, staring, walking slowly

Scared: Heart pounding, freezing, backing away, voice shaking

When students write, instead of "He was scared," they write: "His heart raced. He couldn't move."

Read a passage from a good book. Highlight moments where the author shows emotion or action rather than stating it. "The author doesn't say 'She was excited.' She shows: 'She bounced on her toes and clapped her hands.' Which is better?"

What characters say and how they say it shows emotion. "I'm fine" (written angrily) shows different emotion than the same words spoken kindly. Dialogue reveals character.

Show doesn't mean only actions. Include sights, sounds, textures, tastes, smells. "The room was sad" (tell). "The room was cold. Dust motes hung in a shaft of weak sunlight. The curtains hung limp and faded" (show through description).

Guided practice: Take a piece of student writing with lots of telling. Rewrite one sentence together, showing instead. Then students rewrite their own work, finding places where they told and showing instead.

Important: All showing and no telling makes writing slow and wordy. A balance is needed. Some telling (summaries) moves the plot forward. Showing (detailed scenes) draws readers in. Good writers use both strategically.

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